In the search for your new self as a busy devoted but fulfilled mom, you certainly need some help to learn how to focus on your inner self. We always tend to guess, know or try to understand what’s best for our children, husband, parents, pets, colleagues, friends or neighbours, whoever they are, you certainly try your best to helps them. But what about you?
I’m quite sure you forgot to help yourself somewhere along the way. And here you are, wanting do little things just for yourself. But you can’t figure out what to do! It seems you don’t know how to communicate with your inner self anymore.
That’s exactly where meditation comes in handy. This time of peacefulness and quiet time is the perfect exercise to stop and refocus. The big question is: why focusing?
1- Reduce stress
Meditation allows us to focus more on our daily life; and being able to focus more helps reduce our stress in unexpected situations. Have you noticed how, sometimes, small things in our lives have a huge negative effect on our mood? That’s because we lose the ability to focus on the biggest scheme. We let the tiny details, the one we see right in front of our nose, overtake our brain without even resisting it.
Learning to focus helps us keep in mind the ultimate goals. Your goal is to raise your children in a safe and clean house. Not to freak out because one of them just spilled his or her hot chocolate on the kitchen floor you just cleaned. What’s a cup of chocolate in a lifetime anyway? Will you ever remember it a couple of months? In ten years will you think: “Oh! I remember when my son/ daughter spilled his/her hot chocolate on the floor! How it was disturbing and how I was so angry but efficient at cleaning everything in a matter of minutes?”
I guess you’ll rather remember what a good time you had in your kitchen with your kids. The games you played, and even the spilled drinks. It is so much fun to remember how clumsy a child or an adult can sometimes be! It is so important to me that I wrote an entire post on Why Real Quality Time With Your Family Is Beneficial For You!
You’ve got my point! Focusing on your ultimate goal helps you stay relaxed. If you are in a real hurry, well, you can ask your kids to help you clean. Because if you are late, they are too. Or, let’s be crazy and clean later!
2- Improve your efficiency
Actually, there is no big secret here: if you are focused, you are more efficient. How many times do you repeat that to your kids as they are doing their homework?
As a devoted Mom, you made the point of not letting them forget about focusing. But what about you? I’m sure that like many moms, your biggest superpower is multitasking, and you are so proud of it. But multitasking is a very dangerous friend. You can’t do anything as well as possible if you are doing 5 things at the same time. First, you can’t do 5 things at the same time; you constantly switch from one to another.
Secondly, you lose a lot of time when switching from one task to another. You are far more efficient when focusing on one single activity. It doesn’t mean you can’t do two things at the same time. You can sing when you shower, talk when you are having dinner with your family, and listen to music when you are doing your laundry. But you can’t focus on two things at the same time. One of the tasks has to be a no-brainer, or both of your activities will suffer from your multitasking choice.
3- You enjoy more what you are doing
Do you really enjoy the time you spend “playing” with your children if you are mopping the floor, or even scrolling your Instagram feed at the same time? Will you be satisfied, at the end of the day, if you think of the time you gave to your kids, knowing that you didn’t fully enjoy them? They certainly did not benefit from your presence either.
Regarding the big important things in your life, they deserve your best. If it’s a priority in your life, you must block time for them. So, focusing on one activity makes the experience more enjoyable, more fulfilling, and the result more rewarding.
The power of mediation
Meditation doesn’t have to take long. Many apps are very easy to use and offer 5 to 10 min guided session. My favourite one is Calm. These sessions are particularly useful for children or beginners. You don’t want to spend time guiding others in the family when you want to enjoy the session too. So, let’s be selfish and let the experts speak for you and guide you and your family all at once in a 5 min break.
I strongly advise trying from time to time a longer meditation on your own. If you are in a noisy environment, put on your headphones! But a 30 min guided meditation could help you realize how beneficial it can be. 5 mins at a time are enough for daily practice as it’s not a huge imposition. A 30 mins session even only once, is the ideal occasion to understand the relaxing power of meditation. You can find some guided meditation of various length on YouTube. I love the ones based on affirmations or with a healing purpose.
The tiny last thing about meditation
One last trick! When I wake up in the morning, I’m stretching my neck, arms, and shoulders as I’m still sitting in bed. But before getting out of bed to finish my stretching session, I spend 2 minutes “meditating” on nothing. I just try to empty my mind for two minute-ish so that I can start my day “fresh” from any old thoughts.
It’s not much, but it’s really helping unwind the mind and let go of worries.
I’d like to know if you have some meditation practice habits. Please share them in the comment below! Enjoy a peaceful day.
If you want to read more about how to Refocus to improve your personal and professional life:
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